Staying Focused on the Journey

Getting Real with Ourselves

2008-11-26T08:56:00.000-08:00

Last year at this time, I was coming to grips with a health related challenge that manifested itself in October of 2007. High cholesterol and high blood pressure resulting from too much weight, poor eating, stress, and a lack of regular exercise nearly floored me. I was just getting started with medications, new eating habits, and regular exercise in November of 2007. A year later, I would give myself a B+ grade concerning how well I’ve dealt with my health challenge. For seven months (Dec. of 2007 to July of 2008) I worked hard, watched diligently what I ate, exercised regularly and kept my blood pressure at a perfect low level. In that time I lost 50 pounds and generally felt good. In July my grandmother passed away and we entered into a demanding time pastorally at F.C.C. Through the summer months I kayaked a few times a week at Charles Mills Lake, but I stopped my other exercise regiment, and eased back on my stringent eating practices. Truthfully, I allowed myself to become reacquainted with sweets (my downfall) as a means of reducing stress, and increased my portion sizes in addition to total food intake. Before long, my blood pressure was up again and I had put 8-10 pounds back on. I’ve come to the realization that medicine is not enough to overcome my health challenge. When I’m stressed (and who isn’t stressed these days) I want a cookie or a piece of pie, and even though I know that exercising will help, I can talk myself out of it in a minute. Fortunately, I’m one month back into using the treadmill daily, and began a new strength training regiment this week. My blood pressure has gone down and I’m feeling good, but I haven’t totally dealt with the eating challenge yet. Isn’t it funny how often we know what we have to do, but making it happen is another issue. Usually, upon close examination there is a good reason why we hit these “blockages” when it comes to moving forward. We are usually gaining something from the unhealthy practices. In my case, eating sweets seems to produce a positive affect on stress, however I know that it’s actually making me feel good and killing me at the same time. Spiritually speaking, there are habits and practices that can make us feel good but actually are killing us spiritually. Gossiping, failing to pray, failing to read and study God’s word, failing to worship regularly, neglecting to find a way to use our gifts to serve the Lord will all take a toll on our overall spiritual health. We may be experiencing some momentary sense of feeling good from sleeping in on Sunday or choosing to watch television instead of spending time with the Bible, but eventually our souls will pay the price. I’m going to fight this blood pressure thing, which means I will have to deal with my eating habits. What is it that you need to do for your body and soul in the days ahead? Maybe this season of Thanksgiving will remind us of all that we have to live for, and encourage us to live in ways that gratefully praise the Father of light.

Privilege

2008-08-26T11:49:00.000-07:00

On August 11,12, and 13 during the Vacation Bible School, eleven open minded “Caucasians” (whatever that means today) gathered to learn about and discuss the topic of race. We used a video curriculum entitled Race – The Power of an Illusion, a three part, three hour long documentary style study series on race in America. The curriculum challenged many assumptions that the group had about race, and provided many examples of how our nation has historically favored one group of people over another. I would describe the experience as not so much an “in your face” encounter, but a steady “hammering away” at the resistance that refuses to hear that lighter skin coloring translates into privilege in our nation. By the end of our three days, I believe that everyone involved got the message that the curriculum was communicating, however we struggled to articulate what we could do about the injustice of it all. How do you change a system that is weighted? How do you reconcile the point that legal scholar John A. Powell makes in this statement: “The slick thing about whiteness is that you can reap the benefits of a racist society without personally being racist?” In the end, I concluded that I need to be more attentive to how people are being excluded or included within the systems that I interact with. Of course church life is a primary system that I interact with, so I’m challenged to ask “Whose voices are not being heard within the life of our church?” Are there ways that we can be more inclusive? Are there ways that we are being exclusive? I don’t have answers to those questions, but I have been challenged to look at all of this more closely and prayerfully. At the end of September we receive a special offering for Reconciliation, this provides our denomination with funding to help combat racism. This is an opportunity to do something concrete to help address this issue. I'm sure that each day will provide more opportunities to do something concrete.

Changing Friendships

2008-06-26T06:38:00.000-07:00

I was saddened today to learn that a friend died of a heart attack. I met Lenny Fuentes while serving the church in Cadillac Mi. Lenny and his wife Nadine had moved there from California to care for Nadine’s aging mother. Lenny was on fire for the Lord, he was a man who just wanted to serve God and his neighbor in any way that he could. He was the type of guy that would come to the pastor and say, “How can I help you in your ministry?” During the four years that we shared life and ministry in Cadillac, we experienced many hours of prayer and many good experiences. When Lenny returned to Highland California he poured himself into ministry in the local church and has touched many lives over the last decade. After leaving Cadillac, I asked Lenny for a favor, if he would fill out a job reference sheet for me. Lenny’s response was “Your ministry and friendship have blessed my life and I love you, I would die for you.” He wasn’t kidding around when he said this. That was the type of friend Lenny was. If I would have called him in California and said “Lenny I need your help” he would have dropped all and been on his way. You don’t get too many of those types of friends in life. Friendships seem to come and go, changing all the time, but true friendships are eternal. I know that Lenny has joined a few other brothers and sisters in the Lord who are watching over me as I serve Christ and rooting the church on in its mission. His love and prayers have changed from being earthbound and limited to being eternal and heaven empowered. One more friend joins the great cloud of witnesses that stands in support of Christ’s mission here on earth. I’m sad, but I also gain strength in knowing that heaven has one more friendly witness. May God inspire us all to care for each other, the way Christ cares for us.

Waking up on holy or shaky ground

2008-06-19T07:24:00.000-07:00

I believe that it was Henny Youngman who used to joke that he woke up on the wrong side of the bed… the side with the wall. I can relate, sometime the problems of life seem to hit me in the face before I even get up and moving. Even though my bed is in the middle of the room, occasionally I will wake up and figuratively hit a wall. All it takes is a stray thought, a concern that creeps into my consciousness, and as I lay in bed ready to get up my mind is off and rolling on a litany of troubles. I’ve come to realize that this is caused by “stress overflow.” Stress has to come out in some way, so it sneaks out when I am only half awake and takes control of my thoughts. I’ve also come to realize that how much control I give stress over my morning thoughts, determines whether I awaken standing on holy ground or shaky ground. Awakening in the morning has some inherent blessings attached to it. First and foremost, I’m alive, God has chosen to give me one more day at life. Second, another day is another chance to get it right, to live in a way that blesses God and the world around me. Third, there is always the possibility that the day ahead will be the most spectacular day of my life. I’ve had some pretty good ones, but I have to believe that with God, the best is yet to come. Philippians 4:13 reads “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” This includes waking up and crashing through a wall of troubles that exist for the primary purpose of stealing my joy. May we all “…be transformed by the renewing of our minds, so that we may discern what is the will of God – what is good and acceptable and perfect” (Romans 12:2)

Being "Real"

2008-05-23T14:15:00.000-07:00

This morning I was drinking my morning coffee and watching a local talk/news program on television. Two pastors from a new church start were there promoting their faith community. They were going on about how their church was “real” and “relevant,” how you could come dressed any way you want, and how the music was “hip hop” but with a Christian message. My initial reaction was, “Well that’s great, another effort to try to reach people for Christ can’t hurt, after all Jesus said ‘Whoever is not against us is for us.” (Mark 9:40) My feelings changed however when the pastor said (not a precise quote) “There are church buildings on every corner in our city but I don’t believe that many are the real church, we are a real church, we are out there in the community working.” So all these church buildings don’t house real churches huh? I’m about sick of this whole “We are the cool church” marketing strategy that a lot of churches are using today. It’s as if they are vying for people who are stuck in their high school days. If you want to be cool, come to our hip and relevant church and you can be cool like us. We deal with the real problems of real people because we are really cool. First of all, if you have to tell people how cool you are, you probably aren’t cool. Second, being real isn’t about wearing jeans with the knees ripped out or a style of music. Being real is about being authentic about who you truly are. Some of the most authentic Christian people that I’ve met over the years, dress up on Sunday morning for church, and sing the old hymns. Their authenticity comes from the fact that they genuinely love Jesus Christ and live in a way that honors him. I understand the need to communicate the gospel in ways that help people to be more open to Christ, but because you are “real,” does not mean that everyone else is not authentic in their own faith. Being “real” has a different look on different people. For some it is about wearing jeans and a tee shirt and listening to drums and electric guitars, for others it is wearing dresses and suits and organ music. Personally, I hate getting strangled every Sunday by a necktie, but not as much as I hate wearing a robe. Frankly, I don’t care what people wear, and as long as the music isn’t being slaughtered, I don’t care what style that is either. The important thing for me is that we are open and honest about our need for God.

I’m not very good at surprise parties

2008-05-19T10:40:00.000-07:00

My mother turned 70 on May 16th and we planned a surprise party for her on Saturday the 17th. However, the surprise part of the equation didn’t work out very well. It turns out that she was tipped off by suspicious behavior. She knew something was up when her son (me) and her mother both did not call her on her birthday. It never really occurred to me that not calling her Friday would give away Saturday’s surprise, nor in my mind was there a distinction made between “real” birthday and the day of celebrating her birthday. I just don’t think about stuff like that. My thoughts were simple: mom’s birthday, go there Saturday, get card and gift, I’m covered. To be honest, I vaguely thought that I might have given it away earlier in the week on the phone by saying “I’ll see you Saturday at the party.” But I guess that it was the lack of a call on her “real” birthday that actually tipped her off. Oh well, I’m pretty much attributing my poor surprise party capabilities to the fact that I spend so much of my life as a pastor trying to communicate to others, hence holding back information just doesn’t come naturally. Or it could just be that as a man I have no sense of the fun related to all of this. My sisters understood, they all called and didn’t tip mom off. Yet when I was a child I do remember enjoying surprise parties, maybe I’m just getting old. Yea that will work, I’m sure that I am just getting old. Needless to say, the party was a good time anyway, surprise or not.

A visit from the grandkids

2008-05-14T10:19:00.000-07:00

Around lunch time yesterday my daughter dropped by the office with my two year old grandson Ayden and his six month old sister, Addison. We visited for a while and I held my granddaughter and watched Ayden buzz around the nursery like a little bumblebee. Addison is the calmest baby that I have ever met and Ayden is the opposite. Yesterday he was especially energetic after drinking half of his mother’s sweet tea when she wasn’t watching. Ayden has been making these visits since he was younger than his sister and it has been fun to watch him grow in both his size and understanding. When I first saw him yesterday in the church nursery he said to me “Pe-pah (where he got that name for me I’ll never know) where’s Jo?” He was asking about our Sunday morning nursery attendant Jo Ellen, naturally assuming that she should be there in the nursery whenever he was there. I laughed at the clarity of his speech and said “She’s only here on Sundays Ayden.” It has been amazing to see his little mind work at making these types of associations. Like when we drive by a restaurant and he says “Eat” or “Lunch” or when we drive by the Chuckie Cheese and he yells “Mouse” (he’s afraid of that big costumed mouse character, but strangely drawn to him at the same time). At one point Ayden thought that maybe his grandmother was hanging around the church some where and he led me off on a search for “Me-mah.” Right now church for Ayden is a fun visit, both on Sunday morning and during the week. I can’t wait to see how his understanding will grow related to this. Eventually it will become about more than just playing in the nursery and seeing “Me-mah” and “Pe-pah.” Hopefully, he will feel the love of God and know the love of the people who make up the church. Right now I’m sure that the church building is huge to him, each time he enters the sanctuary he stares upward at the high ceiling. I’m hoping that his perception of the church will never shrink in size, that it will have a large influence on his life. As Jesus said “Let the little children come unto me, of such is the Kingdom of Heaven.”

When you find that right cause…

2008-05-12T09:03:00.000-07:00

I had a phone conversation with my younger sister yesterday about her experience working with her local Relay for Life campaign in Warren Ohio. My sister has been doing this for a number of years now. During the two day event, her booth raised several thousand dollars and she said that the overall event had contributed over $450,000.00 toward the cause of eradicating cancer. That is a lot of money for one economically challenged small town in Ohio to contribute, and I know that this is a year around pursuit for many of the folks who are involved in the effort. Obviously my sister has found the right cause to invest in. I love to see people connecting with an organized effort that inspires them to make a difference in the world. I love it when people unite around a common cause, energetically attacking a challenging goal with the power of agreement and cooperation. My favorite experiences of church leadership have been those times, when people have looked beyond their own self interests and worked together to make big things happen. My worst experiences of church leadership have been when people have taken a selfish opinion or idea and promoted discord and argumentation about something that has little or no significance in the Kingdom of God. Surprisingly though, some will fiercely rally around life’s “mole hills” like they are the true mountain sized issues of existence. Successful organized efforts don’t get caught up in confused understandings about what is important and what purpose the organization serves. Sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ is the primary mission of the church and when people agree and cooperate in this common cause, big things happen. I need to constantly remind myself that this is the cause that I have been called to and agreement and cooperation, with the help of God, will bring success.

A Family Funeral

2008-05-08T06:57:00.000-07:00

After 13 years of being a pastor, I’m starting to lose count of the number of funerals that I have officiated at. It’s a sacred trust to be able to enter into people’s lives at the time of their loved one’s death. Sometimes, you know that you have done it well and people “are at a better place” emotionally and spiritually because of the experience. Other times, you just aren’t sure if it made any difference at all. At the very least you can find consolation in the fact that you have offered something needed, at a time when others don’t have the ability or emotional strength to do it. This week I officiated at my wife’s aunt’s funeral. I’ve done a few family funerals over the years, but most of the time I am talking about people who I only have a superficial knowledge of how they truly lived. The family was pleased with what I said about my wife’s aunt and I heard comments like “Funeral services are much better when the one doing them knows the person.” I agree whole heartedly with that statement, but I also know that people are complicated, and I’m uncertain that anyone can truly know another person. Pastors and others touch on experiences that we have had with the person, observations about their character, or feelings that their lives evoke in others; however it’s a rare experience to have someone share their true selves with you. Actually, when they do, it’s probably not what people would want to hear at a funeral. Needless to say, this whole experience of a family funeral reminds me that there is one who does know us fully, and when I offer my services to people at the time of death, I go in Christ’s name with the hope that I might help others to realize his presence and peace. It is nice when a funeral service is done by someone who knows the person, but it is even nicer when we receive consolation from the one who knows us best.

First Thoughts

2008-05-07T12:06:00.000-07:00

Jesus said (as recorded in Luke 6:45) that out of the overflow of one's heart the mouth speaks. I've never spent much time regularly recording my thoughts, or even regularly monitoring the content of my thoughts. However, I've heard that this blogging can be a powerful spiritual discipline when taken seriously. If nothing else, it seems like it could be a good way to vent about stuff that everyone around you is sick of hearing about. Write it down and let it go. Maybe this will be a good way of organizing the content of the words that do flow out of my mouth. Maybe it will be a cathartic experience. Who knows, but I'm ready to give it a try.