A Family Funeral

After 13 years of being a pastor, I’m starting to lose count of the number of funerals that I have officiated at. It’s a sacred trust to be able to enter into people’s lives at the time of their loved one’s death. Sometimes, you know that you have done it well and people “are at a better place” emotionally and spiritually because of the experience. Other times, you just aren’t sure if it made any difference at all. At the very least you can find consolation in the fact that you have offered something needed, at a time when others don’t have the ability or emotional strength to do it. This week I officiated at my wife’s aunt’s funeral. I’ve done a few family funerals over the years, but most of the time I am talking about people who I only have a superficial knowledge of how they truly lived. The family was pleased with what I said about my wife’s aunt and I heard comments like “Funeral services are much better when the one doing them knows the person.” I agree whole heartedly with that statement, but I also know that people are complicated, and I’m uncertain that anyone can truly know another person. Pastors and others touch on experiences that we have had with the person, observations about their character, or feelings that their lives evoke in others; however it’s a rare experience to have someone share their true selves with you. Actually, when they do, it’s probably not what people would want to hear at a funeral. Needless to say, this whole experience of a family funeral reminds me that there is one who does know us fully, and when I offer my services to people at the time of death, I go in Christ’s name with the hope that I might help others to realize his presence and peace. It is nice when a funeral service is done by someone who knows the person, but it is even nicer when we receive consolation from the one who knows us best.